"If they fit" - Annalogue75 © Original 2023 via Creative Fabrica Spark™.
If life was a person it would be rolling on the floor laughing about the bizarre twists and turns this year and the last took. The unpacking, repairing, and rebuilding I have done isn't what I would consider funny - but maybe from another perspective it's amusing, and perhaps in time I can see that too.
"You can't make this shit up!"
Truer words have never been spoken... I wish I was joking, but nope, I am not. As the end of 2023 is around the corner I thought a summary of my year could be entertaining... Uhh hum, for you that is, I'm still processing it. I'll throw in some background information, just because it's needed.
"Make it make sense."
That was a mantra I repeated daily in 2022, just as the year before. I've continued repeating it throughout this year, with exception for the month of April. That month was exceptional, and not in a good way. And the world is still just as unpredictable and senseless, nothing really changes.
It was in the second half of 2020 the little snow flake fell that would be the start of a giant avalanche, bringing the mountain down with it. As many others I struggled with my mental health during the lockdown, and as I dealt with that my eyes was also opened for the situation I was in. Thanks to modern medicine I got back my energy, my spark, and a drive that I thought I had lost forever, so I started to prepare for a better life for myself and my children. Then Cuomo Gate started...
I can't deny that the whole media psychosis that developed in 2021, and the irrationally dysphoric politicians and officials coming out like locust from the woodwork wasn't at least a little bit (a lot) entertaining and somewhat (a lot) inspirational to pick a fight with. Some of us that saw what was really happening, that it was built on lies and egos, we gathered in a group and created a movement and community to fight for the facts, truth, and justice. Yeah, our heads were sooooo big...
Fast forward to late 2021, early 2022, and the group I co-founded was the biggest and most active supporter group for Governor Andrew M Cuomo. We had only his best interest in mind - that was my conviction and flaming sword. Oh boy, I was so wrong. So wrong!
I mean, the vast majority of the members, and at least a few of us on the board, were really in it because we believed we fought the good fight. We believed we could indeed change the public narrative, present situation, and influence major societal change.
Did I mention how big our heads were...?
"Never, never, never give up!" *
With a few exceptions our organization and the Cuomo Community were, and the Community still is, built and run by honest, intelligent, educated women with big, warm hearts and a burning desire to be the change. But when the idiotic documentary came into play..., oh lordy...! The summer of 2022 turned into a very stressful and confusing time. In hindsight the documentary was mostly wishful thinking, but many of us thought for the longest time it was a legitimate process happening - and we just had to "trust the process."
Yeah, don't do that. Trust your gut.
On a completely different and more personal note - my relationships throughout 2022 were... not good either. A former partner made life difficult just because he had issues with a row of things, me included. And during the late summer I found out who my true friends and allies were. The biggest effect and event was when I was removed and shunned from the organization I had been part of building up. The effects were huge on many levels, and over a year later, in the late autumn of 2023, it was clear I still lived rent free in a number of people's heads. I am sure they know about these blogs by now...
In the late months of 2022 a new experience for me took place - I was persued by a man, a much younger man... It was both confusing and wonderful at the same time, I've never been popular so I admit that I was flattered. But I refused to fully engage in it emotionally, but lost that battle in early 2023...
What has gone down during 2023 deserve its own blog all together, so keep your eyes open for Part 2...
/Annalogue75
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* Winston Churchill
