About This You May Tell: January 2024

Jan 31, 2024

How to not journal - a reflection

I hear journaling is the best since sliced bread for mental health and overall emotional wellbeing. Ok, I should try it then. My therapist said it's a great idea, it pairs perfectly with working on my CBT¹ skills. Sure, I'll absolutely do it. I do have memories of writing in my diaries growing up, so it could be fun. Yes, there were quite a few diaries, I never kept it up for long and often restarted, always needing a new diary to write in. Now I know why...

To journal isn't much different than blogging, it's the audience that is the big difference. That's ok with me, I can have both. What media to use is all about personal comfort, I normally like electronic media better, but it's nice with pretty books to write in so I should get one, or a few... And pens plus pencils, love that idea!

Journalling is a structured activity that can be done at varius times and at different lengths, and there are no real guidelines, unless one follow a themed journalling book. I have a few of those now too, so I shouldn't get bored. It's just to sit down and write something - that's journaling. Easy, right?

With all this, I should do well in my journaling, shouldn't I? Nah... Well yes. Maybe. It depends on the definition of "doing well"...

By the way, one important thing to remember about us people with ADHD - we thrive with structure and routines, but we hates it... 😆

Gollum said it best! The meme comes from

r/adhdmemes on Reddit.

There are apparently as many ways to journal as there are trees in a forest, but some makes more sense than others, depending on the individual.

For example, the guided journals are great if you want or need a clearly defined framework, and there are so many to choose from. I bet you can find guided journals specifically for any group or individual interest - the dog owners daily thought on a leash, commuters door to door notes, or, my favorite, journaling for dummies... Ok, I made those up - but I wouldn't be surprised if something similar is available out there!

I am more of a straight writer, but you could also add drawings, cutouts, memorabilia, or photos and pictures, that makes it a little bit more scrapbook like journalling perhaps. There are probably more ways to journal than I can think of...

The writing form is also something that can vary - I prefer to write to someone (like I do now), but to write to oneself, in third person, past tense, present form, as bullet points, in short hand, in text messaging form, or as a fictional story are all really great and useful options. There's no right or wrong, as long as one get that journal going. In the end you journal for yourself and sharing it is optional and a personal choice. I don't share everything with you, almost everything but not all. Surprised?

To me, the things all journalling seems to have in common are the aesthetics and the persistence - but what that means is a very individual matter. However, I think everyone can agree on that, besides readability, the visual form is particularly important, from an aesthetic standpoint as well as a source of joy and pride of one's work. Though a persistent writing habit is kind of necessary and the most important thing to keep it up and for it to exist at all. That's where my problem lies. I'm working on that...

I am continuing my journalling journey and I will notify you all if I find one way that is better than all the others. You can count on me..., I couldn't shut up about it even if I tried! LOL

/Annalogue75

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¹) CBT — Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

New Blogger Blog

The Unsupervised Poetry Corner that was running as a newsletter on Substack™ is making a reappearance as a standalone publication here on Blogger™ starting February 1st.

It will be much less talk and... well, not really action, but it will showcase my poetry¹ and accompanying art¹ with or without commentary¹.

/Annalogue75

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¹) All material created by me is © and all rights reserved. As of now, January 2024 and onwards, reproduction, distribution, sharing, and copying is free with proper attribution to Annalogue75 and/or Anna Vavare. This is subject to change and modification without notice.

Jan 29, 2024

Secrets And Secrecy

How many of us have secrets that aren't necessarily needed to be kept from anyone, it just happened?

I'm not talking about regular or sudden forgetfulness, or overlooking to tell someone something. That's human nature and natural. I am talking about something else, let's call it an unintended secrecy.

I have a few unintentional secrets, and they usually stem from an uncertainty of the informations importance. Sometimes I have also wanted to avoid emotional impact and kept things quiet that aren't a big deal in general, but might have been in that specific situation. The difference between a secret and a forgotten disclosure is, simply speaking, the conscious intention. You made a choice or you couldn't choose but wanted to.

Other secrets are selective - some people are in the know and some people are being kept in the dark.

These secrets can on one hand be very innocent and understandable - like when the parents know what presents their child will get on their birthday, but the child has no idea.

On the other hand, this type of secrets can be vicius and sinister when the intention is to cause disruption, grief, or harm. For example, to force a secrecy by presenting it as a matter of false confidentiality, "Don't tell anyone, but...", and play on peoples sense of guilt, or to blalantly exclude individuals or groups of people, knowing that they will be negatively impacted by the secret when it is kept from them.

Yet another kind is the absolute secret, consciously kept and buried deep.

The first thing that comes to mind here is trauma, but also thoughts and fantasies of violence, damage, and cruelty that aren't appropriate or can be harmful. But there can be other reasons too.

The secret can be kept because of fear, it can also be because of shame, and in some cases it can be to protect others or oneself from harm.

I would say this type of secret is the most harmful one for the individual, as it causes a lot of stress and anxiety, and there's really no good way to escape those effects and keep the secret.

Lastly there's the secret that isn't a secret anymore.

The relief when a secret is revealed and the truth can come out - it's like the butterfly breaking free from the chrysalis and flutter away with haste. Sometimes it's the consequences of the secrecy that warrant for it to be revealed, other times it just isn't needed to keep the secret anymore. Either way it's a relief to come clean and let it go.

It's easy to be cruel when there are secrets around, and it's easy to be blamed for keeping them and for telling them too. Damned if you do - damned if you don't... So when they say it's best not to keep or create secrets they have a good point.

The occasional little white lie (Remember Santa and the tooth fairy?) is likely harmless, but even those need to be closely monitored so they don't have unintended negative consequences.

Secrets are tricky and comes in many forms - it's definitely better the fewer we have.

/Annalogue75

Jan 26, 2024

I wrote myself a letter

I wrote myself a letter of encouragement, support, and love.

It is also a letter to you if and whenever you need it.

It is published on Medium and you can access it HERE

/Annalogue75

Never change You for Me

Never, ever change who you are for anyone else but yourself. Don't change for him, for her, for me, or anyone. Change because YOU need and want to for YOU.

It's easier said than done, isn't it? As a people pleaser, by nature and by choice, I find it very difficult to resist to change to be seen, liked, respected, heard, and loved. But I don't do it. I simply stubbornly ginger-refuse to do it, even though I really, really, really want to sometimes. I may temporarily adapt, that's true, but I won't change unless I want to, for me.

Think about it... If we change ourselves for others, then who are we really? A self-made reflection of the other person, or scattered remains of ourselves for them to put together as they wish? Are we really anything of value at all if our personalities and traits are so easily disposable we can shed them and exchange them on a whim or at will?

I refuse to believe any of that is of any value at all, changing for others never is. But I understand how tempting it is to change something that seems undesirable in the moment just to feel more comfortable and, for example, be more attractive for a special someone or worthy of something. I get it, I do. But I also know that this is exactly how fake people function - and they lose every. single. time. Genuine and honest humans like me and you don't change for the sake of the game, we only do it for ourselves. Right? Right!

Just as I will preach about how you shouldn't change for anyone but yourself I also strongly suggest you do your homework and take a look at yourself and be honest what about you that could get better (or be worse!). That insight give you the freedom to choose: you can stay the same ol' you and get the same ol' results and the same ol' life, if that's what you want - or you can take the plunge and change up a few things, see what happens, se what works or not, see what's needed to reach your goals that you haven't yet done.

With that said, and I assure you I do my very best to live as a preach, I'm the first to admit I am kind of a "recovered-from-behind-the-flea-market-dumpster-work-in-progress", and I don't think I'll ever finish working on myself. And why would I? Stagnant is boring, and there's no such thing as enough or perfect when it comes to self development. Plus, I really do want to improve as a woman, friend, partner, and mother - improve myself for my own good and, as a bonus, other's benefit.

While writing this blogpost these two articles was recommended to me by Uncle Goole, because they can apparently read minds now... (kinda joking there). One article was about what men look for in women post divorce, and the other about what you need to be to become successful in life. And I just... Really?! Articles about changing yourself to fit in or please, and with quite compelling arguments too, just as I'm writing about why one shouldn't. How convenient and perfect as examples of the much to common strive to convince people they're never good enough and only x and y are acceptable traits for happiness or success. To sell ad space and gain clicks, that's all - follow the money... Don't change for anyone but yourself, no matter how compelling the arguments are to change to fit in.

And for the record, if those articles are even just a little bit accurate I'm pretty much SOL in both the partner and career department. Maybe I am anyway, but they sure don't help building anyone's confidence. Jesus on burnt toast..., those articles threw around some heavy generalizations! I almost forgot to be critical of the content and bring out the "why's" about the stereotyping, it's so easy to just accept what at first seem like reasonable demands and not think about how we're not all alike and we don't have to be. Always ask "why" and don't assume what you read in the media is true, healthy, and worthwhile, especially if it is about how you need to change to conform and fit a stereotypical ideal. You do you, always.

My takeaway is that I definitely got some more introspective self reflection and fine tuning to do. But that's what I always work on anyway, so nothing new. And I will do it for my own good and my own best interest - but in hopes that others will benefit from it too. TBC...

Yet I'm still hoping being enough is enough.

/Annalogue75

Jan 24, 2024

You gotta love ADHD

The process to accept and also flourish when you're neurodivergent isn't easy. However, a mindfulness approach helps immensely.

I wrote earlier in a blog - this one - that I would return to the topic of ADHD. This is the return, or rather, it is the first leg of a long journey about blogging about ADHD.

So here we go...

I am slowly accepting that I am not the same as you, and also that it isn't all on me to adapt to the neurotypicals wims, habits, and wishes. I know this intellectually and I feel it more by the day. What also has become more and more apparent over time is, that to be accepted for who you are is more of a given between neurotypicals, but it rarely include those with a neurodivergent brain. We're always the outsiders. Go figure...

Did that sound salty? Yeah, it is - because the longer I go through the process of getting to know myself as I truly am, and starting to like this person, unmasking myself, and re-evaluating life, the more angry, and sometimes resentful, I get regarding the assumptions that I have to "be more 'normal' and less myself" to be liked, accepted, and loved. Why is that even ok as an idea in any context, let alone as a silent assumption?! Exchange "ADHD" for something else, ethnicity for example - is it still acceptable to assume and behave as if a different etniticity is a flaw and reject the person or their needs because of it? No? I didn't think so...

My brain is never still, never quiet, but always creative and innovative - it's the upside of being neurodiverse, we get the intellectual stuff done quicker.

Let's dedicate this particular blog to Object Permanence, a complex yet straight forward issue, tied to anxiety, depression, and rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD), as well as a central component in any personal relationship for a neurodivergent person. Use Google for more about it if you need more detailed information. A quick summary:

Object permanence - to know that an object exists even when you can't experience it with your senses. The object can be anything from an item to a person to a place and more, and you know it exists even though your senses can't directly experience it.

Emotional permanence - same as with an object but in regards to other people's emotions towards yourself. If you can experience it with your senses or have a recent memory of it the emotion is still felt, it exists, and it's remembered.

Both of these are a problem for people with ADHD. We intellectually know you exist when you are out of sight, and we do remember you said you /cared/etc - but only for a little bit, and after that... Yeah, out of sight out of mind. You kind of dissapear from our memory bank, and so does your emotional footprint. The latter can actually disappear even when we interact with a person if they don't regularly express what they feel for us. It's quite uncomfortable when we're aware of it happening, yet unavoidable as a phenomenon on an emotional level.

So for example, to ask something like "Do you love me?" isn't about setting a trap for you by us, we sincerely want to know because we don't remember when or if it was said... And it's not about being needy or self centered, or rude and disrespectful, it's about a poor working memory and a poorly functioning frontal cortex. We have to deal with that reality daily, and we know it requires a whole lot of empathy and adaptation from people around us as well.

"For example, formation of synapses in the frontal cortex peaks during human infancy, and recent experiments using near infrared spectroscopy to gather neuroimaging data from infants suggests that activity in the frontal cortex is associated with successful completion of object permanence tasks." ¹

I can't fully grasp object permanence, including emotional permanence. Because of the surreal experiences that deficit leads to, including RSD and anxiety, it shouldn't be seen as wrong to ask for reasonable accomodations, support, and empathy from friends, family, and loved ones. It's actually in comparison very much like when a physically impaired person needs accomodations. My disability (and this is a true disability, believe me) is invisible though, so just as a diabetic I have to ask to get the help and support I need, that's my responsibility to do and yours to remember. It is really that simple and yet absolutely that difficult.

If you know someone with ADHD, ask them what they need, validate that need and normalize it, give them a break from feeling needy and broken. Make them feel accepted.

This was just the first blog about ADHD out of many more to come. The topic of Object Permanence will surely come up again too, it's kind of a big deal.

/Annalogue75

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¹) Wikipedia - Object Permanence

Jan 21, 2024

Theme Song For Life

———

If you could choose one song to be your life's theme song, what would it be?

———

I am split - because why be simple when you can be complex, right? (No, not "difficult"... Complex. Same same? Whatever, it just sounds better, ok. LOL)

I reason as follows...

I've loved the song Somewhere I belong with Linkin Park since it first came out because it speaks to me and puts words on thoughts I haven't been able to verbalize for myself. (I know, right?! Who could imagine...) As almost all their songs, until the passing of Chester Bennington, it's about the struggle with depression and being alone with your inner demons. I love it, but it's not really the song I would label as my theme song. Perhaps a good thing.

When I attended UPW² Virtual with Tony Robbins in March 2021 the music was amazing and the playlist very well curated for the event, not surprising of course. But the song that stood out and touched me on a deeper level was Whatever it takes with Imagine Dragons. It's an empowering song that for me stands for something to strive for and what I would like to be able to one day say. But it isn't my theme song, though it really could be.

No, my theme song have been with me for many years, and I cannot possibly feel anything but happy and inspired when I listen to it. It was played at US President Joe Biden's inauguration in 2020, though the band had long since split at that point. I try to spread it around every so often by mentioning it in discussions and bring it up in conversations as it's just... supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

So I will say that, despite some really great candidates in competition, my life's theme song simply must be You get what you give with New Radicals. And frankly it should be yours too...

/Annalogue75

———

"YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE"

— New Radicals² —

Watch The Official Video Here

One, two

One, two, three, ow

Wake up, kids

We got the dreamers disease

Age fourteen, they got you down on your knees

So polite, we're busy still saying please

Frienemies, who when you're down ain't your friend

Every night we smash a Mercedes-Benz

First we run, and then we laugh 'til we cry

But when the night is falling

You cannot find the light (light)

You feel your dreams are dying

Hold tight

You've got the music in you

Don't let go

You've got the music in you

One dance left

This world is gonna pull through

Don't give up

You've got a reason to live

Can't forget

We only get what we give

I'm comin' home, baby

You're tops

Give it to me now

4 AM, we ran a miracle mile

We're flat broke

But hey, we do it in style

The bad rich

God's flying in for your trial

But when the night is falling

You cannot find a friend (friend)

You feel your tree is breaking

Just bend

You've got the music in you

Don't let go

You've got the music in you

One dance left

This world is gonna pull through

Don't give up

You've got a reason to live

Can't forget

We only get what we give

This whole damn world could fall apart

You'll be okay, follow your heart

You're in harm's way, I'm right behind

Now say you're mine

You've got the music in you

Don't let go

You've got the music in you

One dance left

This world is gonna pull through

Don't give up

You've got a reason to live

Can't forget

We only get what we give

Don't let go

I feel the music in you

Don't let go

Fly high, high

What's real can't die

You only get what you give

You're gonna get what you give

Don't give up

Just don't be afraid to leave

Health insurance, rip off lying

FDA, big bankers buying

Fake computer crashes dining

Cloning while they're multiplying

Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson

Courtney Love and Marilyn Manson

You're all fakes

Run to your mansions

Come around, we'll kick your asses

Don't let go

One dance left

Don't give up

Can't forget

Don't let go

---

¹) UPW - Unleash the Power Within

²) "You get what you give" - New Radicals

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Gregg Alexander / Rick Nowels

You Get What You Give lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Spirit Music Group, TuneCore Inc.

Jan 18, 2024

Lessons learned #1

I have learned, though it took me long enough, that I have to start treating people how they treat me, especially if they don't treat me as I treat them or as well as I deserve. I usually bend over backwards for those I care for, and I see nothing wrong with that. But I need to demand the same voluntary agility from them, and I must demand to be treated with respect and as a valuable person. Because I treat others in that manner and therefore I deserve the same treatment.

As much as it bothers me to pull back and put up those privacy walls I have to start doing it if people aren't as open, generous, and inclusive as I naturally am.

I must admit, all of this feels and sounds so self centered to me, but I know it's more of a normal behavior for most than my behavior is. Another aspect of this is how I feel big emotions for people rather quickly, and it seems so strange to me that people in general don't...

Maybe it's individuality, maybe it's ADHD.

In the recent past I admittedly got big feelings over a simple breakfast waffle, I'm down to earth like that, and #ifyouknowyouknow what I'm talking about, you know everything that day was equally... delicious. A great example of how it should work.

Because even I am not limitless in my generosity - I need the same energy, attention, and treatment back to feel good, to feel human and worthy. That's where my problem lies, I expect too much from people, I expect them to be just like I am.

I am slowly learning to stop and hold back when it's obvious people won't reciprocate what I give. Because until now my way of functioning has cost me more than I've gotten in return, and it has led to less joy and more heartbreak - that has to change.

I find it to be a dilemma that no matter how I look at it I am still adapting to other people's behaviour and thereby their needs, wants, and wishes. The big difference is that where before I felt I both adapted and diminished myself without getting much in return, I am instead giving and adapting on my own terms. And with the condition that I get what I need, want, and wish for back. If not fully, to a greater extent than before anyway. I think I can live with that.

To put oneself as front and center in life doest come naturally to me. I am a giver by nature and I prefer to be the background support and the quiet cheerleader. But over the years, because I'm a million years old by now 😆, I have felt an increased need for reciprocation and finally come to accept that people in general suck at giving back unprompted. That's ok though, it's human nature and there are of course individual differences at play. It is however my own responsibility to ensure I get what I need, I can't expect anyone to just give it to me out of the blue without being asked.

So that's what I will do - just watch me...

/Annalogue75

Jan 14, 2024

If you couldn't fail... Would you?

"What would you do if you knew you could not fail?"¹

—

I would dare to do those things I haven't yet done, and probably never would do otherwise. Like...

Write a book - Guaranteed bestseller!

Do science - It is always right!

Pick up hobbies - Always the master!

Daytona 500 - I would smoke 'em all baby!!

Test careers - Why not, right?!

Speak different languages - Perfectly!!

—

What would YOU do?

/Annalogue75

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¹) Quote from "Goals!" by Brian Tracy

Jan 12, 2024

Dreaming Of A Reality

"Another life" by Annalogue75 © Original 2023 via Creative Fabrica Spark™

There is the reality we live in and then there is the reality we dream of. But which one do we create, do we long for, and why?

I tend to keep my dreams and aspirations to myself, believe it or not. I share some things with people I know and a little with people in general, but most of my goals, dreams, and visions I don't talk about. It isn't always about choice, though many times I would like to share with someone but hold myself back because I am unsure how it will be recieved and interpreted. For the most part I choose to keep it quietly inside - for me that's the best way to go.

Have you thought about what you do with your dreams and why?

Trauma can be a roadblock in visualization of a future, I have learned that the hard way this past year. Where I previously had at least some idea of what I wanted, dreamt of, or aimed for I quite suddenly had absolutely no visions at all. I talked about that in a previous blog, how everything was just grey. Though the colors returned my visions of a future hasn't. I am still without goals, aspirations, and dreams - it's quite surreal and it is accompanied by many tears and feelings of hopelessness.

But as I learn more about the complexity of ADHD, cPTSD, depression, anxiety and how they interact with each other and effect life specifically and generally, I also feel hope that I will get my goals and dreams back again, I just need to be patient.

"Said, woman, take it slowIt'll work itself out fineAll we need is just a little patienceSaid, sugar, make it slowAnd we'll come together fineAll we need is just a little patience"

— Guns N' Roses¹ —

Read more about trauma and imagining the future here.

It is said that the reality we live in is the one we create for ourselves. If that's true, isn't it strange that we don't automatically generate the lives of our dreams? Or is it so that we can create only so much of our dreams, as they also have to fit in and interact with everyone else's dreams and visions? I have questions...

I think that many times it's the fear of the unknown that stops us from realizing our dreams and reach our goals. Fear of what we will have left, fear of the consequences, and fear of what we can't accomplish.

Fear shouldn't stop us, but it's a very human feeling and also a raw survival mechanism, protecting us from going all cray cray with our egocentric wants and wishes.

Perhaps it's even the best option to not being able to fully and completely unaltered get our own goals realized, wishes granted, and dreams fulfilled. Imagine how boring life would be without something to aim for, I know how that feels and I can confirm how empty life gets.

So dream on, my friends. Set those goals, find the inspiration to achieve your aspirations. Make what you can reality and let the rest be the base of new visions and future prospects.

/Annalogue75

---

¹) "Patience"

Album: G N' R Lies

Artist: Guns N' Roses

Released: 1988

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Steven Adler / Izzy Stradlin / W. Axl Rose / Duff Rose Mckagan / Saul Hudson

Jan 8, 2024

Things We Don't Talk About

Do you feel seen now? 😁 Good!

Seriously though, to feel seen and actually being seen are something I often think about, but to voice an opinion about it can be very sensitive, so it isn't often discussed. Personally I often feel like I'm not really seen by those that matter to me, or most anyone actually. It's not like I feel invisible, I kind of feel like I'm being brushed over, overlooked, or even that I'm not of value. Trust me, it's very sensitive to bring this up, I have done it on occasion. Even though it's never meant as an accusation, but rather is an observation that could use some analysis, it often comes across as accusatory. What I revert to in these situations is to express my feelings in an indirect way, being passive-aggressive if you so wish, and I repeat myself out of frustration. That in turn leads to other problems, and any discussion tends to end up like a mudslinging fest in kindergarten - and then everyone is maaaaad...

It has been pointed out that I tend to express my dissatisfaction or need for change in a way that comes off as complaining in a whiny and attention seeking manner. I am aware of this.

Now, to express complaints over other's way of complaining isn't something one usually do unless it's crucial for the discussion or the relationship. It's actually rather taboo - unless you're on social media, where all bets are off and anything goes - but it shouldn't be. It's doing a favor really, before the complaints become unbearable and you just shut off. I take it seriously since it affects constructive communication.

It's however important to distinguish between complaining and attention seeking - like in the story of the shepherd yelling "wolf" - and to offer constructive feedback to the complainant if it's a valid issue. Personally I get stuck in complaining mode if I don't feel heard or understood and if I don't get suggestions for solutions or feedback, a reactive pattern I should address rather than use as an excuse. I'm working on it... The best suggestion I've heard so far to avoid these verbal pitfalls is for the listener to ask:

"Do you want to find a solution, or do you just want me to listen?"

That single sentence hold the complaining party accountable, offers pause, shows empathy and support, plus relieves the party asking it of any reason to feel guilty, triggered, or used.

It's so simple yet brilliant.

Not to brag or anything, but as an adult with ADHD I'm somewhat of an expert in ideation. Of the better kind. I thought for most of my life the zoning out and vivid imagination I had was perfectly normal, it just wasn't something people talked about. Now I know better, and I'm so sorry that most of you out there can't really do it.

"Ideation is the process of generating thoughts or suggestions. /.../ This may also refer to a psychological state of fantasy in which the individual imagines in either a creative or destructive way." ¹

The other kind of ideation, the one with destructive and negative thoughts and imaginative visions... I've been there too, but thankfully not for long or in the darkest parts. It's definitely something "we don't talk about" but something that should be talked about more.

I strongly believe we all have those negative and destructive thoughts, perhaps not in the form of ideation but in one way or another. It's a scary place to be and difficult to admit being in, but we will all go there at some point. What's important is that we get out and bring with us a deeper understanding of what we need to get better, be better, feel better. Right?

There are so many things we don't talk about, for various and mostly valid reasons. Those are also the things we need to start talking about - staying quiet shouldn't be an option. Do you agree?

/Annalogue75

---

¹) Definition from AlleyDog.com

Jan 4, 2024

On another note...

If you read my blog "New Year's Priorities" you'll remember I wrote that I wouldn't make any resolutions and no big, bold promises for the new year, and why - that still stands.

I rather work with intentions and goals, whether it is as full sentences, a short paragraph, or just one word.

So that's what I will do.

But a few days ago I came across some notes from previous years that I wanted to share, because they put this line of thinking in a perspective, se pic below 👇

(Don't worry, I will write out what it says.)

As you'll hopefully see there are different ways to go about New Year's goal setting and visions. These are just two examples . No stressful promises or resolutions has to be made in any way. So from my viewpoint, this is just better.

Objectives for 2023 in a "Better Life Journal" (by Dean Graziosi) - Notes from "New World - New You" online event with Tony Robbins in 2021.

In 2021 I was inspired by the free week long online event "New World - New You" that was hosted by one of my long time favorite life coaches, Tony Robbins. My notes reflect what I saw as the most important things presented during the event, and I still feel it is inspiring. I wrote,

"When did you do something that made you feel uncomfortable? How did you feel before, during, after? Regrets or happiness?"

"When you're not growing you're dying."

"Mini Challenge #2 [uncomfortable] - 'It is in the realm of uncentanty that fulfillment is found.' - To break habits and go outside our comfortzone!!"

How profound aren't these little gems!? I can almost feel the 10/10 energy high just reading this again. Maybe "you had to be there to get it" for that feeling - too bad if you missed it! My notes continued with,

"Comittment (to make) Courage (a) Habit."

"I can't do this so I MUST do it!!"

"Tum SHOULD into MUST."

"Raise Your Standard (or) Keep Your Standard.

Rituals makes it real.

(It takes) dicipline (and) no negotiation."

These short sentences and notes were my guiding lights during 2021, and I feel they kept me motivated and focused during a year that in many ways was worse than 2020 for mental health, drive, and staying goal oriented. Did I succeed in any of it? That wasn't the point, but since you ask, I am still here. That's answer enough.

I've written about 2023 in previous blogs, so I'm not going through it again - but I will add this...

Despite the all-encompassing darkness during that year, the lights at the end of the tunnel was people, not things or accomplishments. It was those individuals that made the year worth it despite everything.

#youknowwhoyouare 🫶

Looking at the notes I made in early 2023, the goals and objectives I set... I'm actually quietly impressed and kind of proud of myself. January was already a rough time and I still managed to scribble down the following:

"Goals without action will never result in anything more than empty dreams.

My Top 3 Goals:

1. Be the master of my time.

2. Be completely financially independent.

3. Be able to do what I enjoy."

"Commitment To Myself:

I [ my name ] am making a commitment to myself to complete my goals by any means necessary. I realize that the only way I can unleash my true potential is through hard work, determination and laser focus on where I want to go."

"Why I Want To Achieve These Goals:

Your "why" is the driving force behind achieving goals. The clearer you are about your why the more committed and motivated you will be. What are your "whys?"

To live a life fully and without regrets."

"Rewarding Myself:

If I complete my goals in a timely manner, I will reward myself by/with:

A vacation to TBD."

I feel even more inspired now, I really put some thought into this. The structure and tone is completely different from the hasty notes in 2021, but from my biased perspective I see there are more similarities than differences.

Once again, did I succeed in any of this? Not fully, but I have definitely moved in the right direction and made progress - and that is good enough during the year's circumstances.

For 2024 I made up my mind about a goal and a vision before the stroke of midnight on New Year's Eve, I have two words I am focusing on. What they are and how my line of thought is this time is to be revealed next year - maybe. I might just keep it to myself. We will see, I'm undecided... 😏

/Annalogue75

Jan 1, 2024

New Year's Priorities

✨ HAPPY NEW YEAR! ✨

How about we start this year slow and steady?

Normally we rush and hurry, so let's take this opportunity to slow down for a little bit. Breathe.

Okay? Okay.

· · ·

I don't make New Year's resolutions. In my opinion it's a recipe for failure and anxiety for most, so I stay clear of them. But a year or so ago I heard about another thing to do around New Year's that appeals to me more than promises and resolutions. It goes something like this...

On or right after New Year's Eve you decide what you want the theme and/or goal to be for the coming year, write it down for yourself to look at often, reminding yourself of what you decided. It's not a promise to do it, but a goal you set to work towards in everything you do.

It could be "get a promotion and feel professionally and personally accomplished" or "find love and discover my passionate side" or "write three short stories and get them published and feel proud of myself."

A variant of this is to find ONE word that is your theme for the year, and have it present in everything you do. Not as a promise, but a guiding beacon, so to speak. Some ideas:

Love

Freedom

Friendship

Finances

Career

Joy

Calm

Learning

I like both ideas, perhaps I will do a combination. But whatever you choose to do, or not, choose it for yourself and no one else. Perhaps keep it to yourself, as your own little "secret mission" for the new year?! Could be exciting to look at it like that actually.

I am staying true to my word and will continue to work on myself and my life first and foremost. 2024 will be a year where I will prioritize myself and I will work on expecting to be prioritized by others, it's about time I start to value myself as much as I value others and expect the same in return. Now, that's not a promise but a mission, but it's not the "secret mission" of the year though.

That one is naturally, by default, secret...

Wherever you are I wish you all a Happy New Year. You are valuable. And remember, about this you may tell - so share it far and wide!

/Annalogue75

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New Year's Priorities

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